Seamless Forever (Sleepless November Saga Book 3) Read online

  By Kelsey Clayton

  This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.

  Copyright © 2019 by Kelsey Clayton

  All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or used in any manner without written permission of the copyright owner except for the use of quotations in a book review. For more information, address: [email protected]

  Book design by Kelsey Clayton

  ISBN 9781092972345

  www.kelseyclayton.com

  Dedicated to my sister, McKaylah.

  I hope you always keep that fire

  in your heart and love in your eyes.

  You’re one of the greatest gifts my

  heart will ever know.

  Stay beautiful.

  Contents

  Preface

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Chapter 5

  Chapter 6

  Chapter 7

  Chapter 8

  Chapter 9

  Chapter 10

  Chapter 11

  Chapter 12

  Chapter 13

  Chapter 14

  Chapter 15

  Chapter 16

  Chapter 17

  Chapter 18

  Chapter 19

  Chapter 20

  Chapter 21

  Chapter 22

  Chapter 23

  Chapter 24

  Chapter 25

  Chapter 26

  Chapter 27

  Chapter 28

  Chapter 29

  Chapter 30

  Epilogue

  Author Note

  Preface

  The sound of his voice ran through my body like hypnosis – silky smooth and spellbinding. Even if I wanted to get away, I couldn't. It was as if I was glued to him, mind, body, and soul. No matter what issues we were going to face in the road ahead, he was confident we could get through them. However, as I stood there looking at the wrench about to be thrown in our plans, I wasn't entirely sure. We'd gotten through a lot, but nothing of this magnitude. None of what we had been through was this irrevocably life changing. All I knew was that this would be it - the make it or break it in our whirlwind romance - and I was utterly and without a single doubt, unprepared to handle it.

  Chapter 1

  “Kayleigh, wait!” He shouts and chases after me.

  I don’t obey, choosing to run down the steps and out to the road. Holden follows behind me, not letting up, and the rest of the party gathers onto the front porch to watch what’s happening.

  “Please don’t leave! You have to listen to me!” He pleads.

  I stop and turn around angrily. “What, Holden?! What the hell do you want from me?! You want me to be your emotional punching bag? The girl you can push away and pull back when it’s convenient for you? I’m not a god damn boomerang. I’m not always going to come back when you do something fucked up. If that’s what you want, then go be with one of the mindless freshmen that fall at your feet, because that’s not me.”

  “That’s not at all what I want, and you know it.”

  “No. I don’t know what you want. I don’t know anything when it comes to you anymore. One minute you love me, the next you’re leaving me at a bar in Cabo or telling me to go snort something up my nose. I can’t keep up with the constant back and forth, and I’m not going to pretend I can. So just tell me, what the fuck do you want?”

  “I want you.” He replies, a tear slipping from his cheek.

  I scoff and take a step back. “Yeah, for today.”

  “No, not just for today. Forever.”

  Exhaling tiredly, I shake my head. “I’m sorry. I don’t believe you.” I spin on my heels and start to walk away from him.

  “Kayleigh?!” He shouts in a panic. It causes me to stop but I don’t dare to turn around as his next words leave his lips. “Marry me.”

  I stay motionless, wondering if I even heard him correctly. Did he really just ask me that? If the circumstances were different, and we weren’t standing in the middle of the road, and he wasn’t drunk, and we weren’t currently broken up – I may have considered it. But they’re not, and we are. The frantic tone of his voice is enough to tell me that he probably didn’t mean it anyway.

  Dropping my head, I walk away, not allowing myself to glance back at the boy who can play my heartstrings like a violin.

  AFTER TOSSING AND TURNING for what feels like forever, I finally manage to fall asleep just before my phone wakes me again. As Dawson’s name appears, I notice it’s two in the morning. Groaning, I answer it and put it to my ear.

  “Daws, I love you and I know it was crazy, but it’s 2 AM. I promise I’ll fill you in, but can we please just talk about it tomorrow?

  “No. Kayleigh, listen.” He interjects. “Holden’s in an ambulance on his way to the hospital.”

  I sit up abruptly, feeling like my heart is shattering inside of my chest. “Come get me, now.”

  He gets to my dorm within minutes. I jump into the car and cannot stop fidgeting in the passenger seat. He doesn’t have any answers to my questions, other than telling me Josephine screamed for Jason to call 911. As soon as we get to the hospital, I stumble out of the car and rush inside.

  Immediately in the waiting room, I can see Jo, Jason, and Caleb, all waiting. Jo spots me and runs into my arms, tears streaming down her face. I hold her tightly, rubbing her back for comfort.

  “Thank God you’re here.” She sobs into my shoulder.

  When she finally pulls away, I ask the million-dollar question. “What the hell happened?!”

  Jo goes back to sitting on Jason’s lap, clearly wrecked with emotion. I choose the seat across from them and Dawson joins me.

  “Well, after you left, Holden didn’t want to be around anyone. When we all went back inside, he grabbed a couple bottles of liquor and went up to his bedroom. I figured he would take a few shots and go to sleep.” Josephine explains. “But when I went to check on him before I went to bed, I found him unconscious and covered in vomit on the floor.” She pauses, trying to hold in her emotions. “Kayleigh, he was barely breathing.”

  The description of it alone makes it feel like my world is crashing down around me. “Is he okay? Please tell me he’s okay.”

  Caleb shrugs while Jason comforts Jo. “We’re still waiting for the doctor.”

  I run my fingers through my hair frustratedly, trying to come to grips with all of this. “I just don’t understand. Why would me walking away from a fake proposal cause him to drink himself into oblivion?”

  They all look at me as if I’m the dumbest person in the room. Jo opens and closes her mouth, trying to figure out what to say. “F-fake proposal?”

  “Yeah…” I reply. “I mean he was panicking. It was just an attempt to keep me. It’s not like he actually wants to get married.”

  Caleb barks out a laugh, Jason looks amused, Josephine face-palms, and Dawson just pats my head like I’m a child. All their reactions cause everything in my mind to come to a screeching halt.

  “Wait, he actually wants to get married?!”

  “Yes, baby.” Jo confirms. “He’s even talked to my mom about it, more than once.”

  “He’s mentioned it to us, too.” Caleb mentions, Jason nodding along with him.

  I throw my head back and groan loudly. Now it all makes sense. Yes, he was freaking out and wanted to keep me, but that doesn’t mean he hasn’t meant it every time h
e’s promised me forever. You’ve got to be kidding me. This stupid asshole proposed to me while drunk and in the middle of an argument. Jesus Christ, he’s lucky I love him.

  I don’t even have a minute to think it over, before the doctor comes out and walks toward us. Jo and I freeze and we all stare at him, trying to prepare ourselves for what may come out of his mouth.

  “I need a family member of Holden Rivers.” He says, looking at all of us.

  Josephine stands from Jason’s lap. “I’m his sister.” She murmurs, following him over to the counter. However, just before she gets there, she turns and reaches for me. I go over to her, grabbing her hand and squeezing tightly.

  “Are you his sister as well?” The doctor questions.

  Jo shakes her head before I can answer. “She’s his fiancé.”

  It’s not true, but I don’t have the heart to correct her right now. Besides, my concern is Holden.

  The doctor nods and turns his attention back to the chart and Josephine. “You saved your brother’s life, bringing him here.” He says, and both of us sob in relief. He’s okay. “He has a BAC of over .350, which is dangerously high. If he had continued drinking, he could have died. His body was reaching comatose levels, which is why he wasn’t breathing well when he arrived.” With every word out of the doctor’s mouth, my nausea intensifies. “We pumped his stomach, and we’re giving him fluids through an IV. I’d like to keep him for observation and so that we can run tests on his liver when the intoxication wears off – make sure he didn’t do any lasting damage.”

  The two of us nod, understanding everything he’s explaining. Jo asks the question on both of our minds. “When can we see him?”

  He smiles. “You can see him now, but only family and one at a time, since it’s after visiting hours.” He turns his attention to me. “I’ll make a note in his chart that since you’re his fiancé, you’re allowed in as well.”

  I thank him quietly, appreciative of Jo’s lie. Turning towards her, I tell her to go first. I can only imagine the stress and fear she felt finding him the way she did. She needs this more than I do right now. She smiles gratefully and follows the doctor through the double doors.

  Allowing myself to take a breath, I go back over to the guys and repeat everything the doctor just said. They’re instantly relieved he’s alright.

  “Can you do me a favor when you guys get home?” I ask Caleb and Jason. They nod and look at me expectantly. “Go through his room. Remove any and all bottles of liquor. Check the closet, too. I know he had some in there a couple weeks ago.”

  The two of them agree, before Caleb leans forward and stares at me, smirking. “So, if you had known it was a real proposal, would you still have walked away?”

  I roll my eyes, chuckling softly. “In the words of Holden – mind your business, Sutter.”

  JOSEPHINE COMES BACK OUT into the waiting room, wiping the tears away from her face, but smiling. Jason gets up and embraces her before she turns to me.

  “He’s asking for you.” She murmurs. “Just, keep in mind he’s still really drunk.”

  “Mad drunk, or clingy drunk?”

  “A mix between loopy drunk and clingy drunk.”

  I sigh happily, just glad he’s not angry. Jo, Jason, and Caleb say goodbye to Dawson and I, heading home to get some rest. Dawson tells me he’s going to wait to drive me home while I go see Holden. I thank him and quickly head through the double doors and down the hallway.

  “Excuse me, I’m looking for Holden Rivers.” I ask the nurse. “His sister said he’s in room 11.”

  She points down the hall and directs me where to go. I follow her instructions until I’m standing outside his door. I take a deep breath to compose myself, and then grab the handle and step inside.

  As soon as I see him, I need to keep myself from crumbling to the floor. Between the hospital gown, the paleness of his skin, and the tubes in his nose for more oxygen – he looks terrible. I don’t even realize I’m crying until Holden looks at me and frowns.

  “Come here.” He slurs, reaching for me with grabby hands. When I get over to him, he squeezes my hand and flops his head to the side. “I’m okie dokie.”

  “But you almost weren’t.” I tell him, not masking the sadness from my voice. “You can’t do shit like that. You can’t. Not to your family, and not to me.”

  He looks as if he’s struggling to stay awake, but he’s doing his best to talk to me. “I sowwy.”

  “Please don’t let it happen again. I can’t handle it.” I sigh, knowing everything I say right now won’t be remembered tomorrow. He’s far too drunk. Anything I want to tell him will have to wait.

  Standing up, I walk back over to the door when a low whine leaves his mouth. “Don’t leave.” He pleads.

  I give him a small smile and shake my head. “I’m not. I’ll be right back.”

  When I get back out to the waiting room, I find Dawson playing on his phone. Once he sees me, he clicks it off and stands up.

  “That was fast.” He acknowledges. “Ready to go?”

  “No, you go ahead. I think I’m going to stay here tonight.”

  He grins broadly, and I can see that he was hoping that would be my answer. He gives me a hug and wishes me luck, telling me to call him if I need anything. I thank him and watch him leave before turning around and going back in with Holden.

  I get back into the room to find he’s sound asleep. Quietly, I turn off the light and pull a chair up next to his bed. Giving myself a moment to look at him, it’s amazing to me how beautiful he still manages to look, even only being illuminated by the lights of the monitors. I lean forward and lightly kiss his forehead before sitting in the chair. Laying my arms and head on his bed – I let the sound of his breathing lull me to sleep.

  Chapter 2

  The feeling of someone running their fingers through my hair wakes me from my peaceful slumber. I almost forget where I am, until the sound of the heart monitor brings it all back to me. In a panic, I sit up quickly and look around. Holden recoils his hand with a sheepish look on his face.

  “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to wake you.” He sounds a lot better than he did last night.

  “No. You’re fine.” I assure him. “How are you feeling?”

  Adjusting himself to sit up straighter, he sighs. “I don’t even remember much of what happened. The doctor briefed me while you were sleeping.”

  Breaking eye contact with him, I nod while looking at the floor. Maybe he doesn’t remember proposing. “We were all really scared.” I admit.

  “Understandable. I’m so sorry.” The sincerity in his voice is overwhelming. “I was shocked to see you here when I woke up.”

  “Holden, you almost died.” I deadpan. “There wasn’t anything in the world that could keep me from being here.”

  He hesitantly reaches forward and holds my hand in his. “Well, I appreciate it. Thank you.”

  “Always.”

  I smile sweetly at him before pulling my phone out of my purse. Holden’s was left at home in the chaos of getting him here, so I’m sure no one has let Josephine know he’s awake. She’s going to be so relieved. As I send her a text, Holden just watches me, caressing my hand with his thumb. Once I’m done, I put my phone on the bed next to him.

  “I asked you to marry me.” He says suddenly, catching me off guard. Okay, so he does remember that.

  I bite my lip as I look at him. “I didn’t know you were serious.”

  “About spending the rest of my life with you? Why wouldn’t I be?”

  “I just thought you were panicking and it was a last-ditch effort to keep me.”

  He ponders it for a second before somewhat agreeing. “Well, I was panicking. You were walking away from me and I was losing you. That doesn’t mean I don’t want it, though.”

  “You’d really marry me?” I ask in complete disbelief.

  He smiles in a way that makes me swoon. “Kayleigh, I’d marry you a year ago.” My heart skips a beat at his
words and I find myself actually considering this. When I look down at the floor and bite my lip, he picks my head back up to face him. “So? You still haven’t give me an answer.”

  “No.” I reply, but as soon as I notice the devastation on his face, I realize what I said. “No, wait, that’s not what I meant.”

  He looks at me vulnerably. “You’re killing me here.”

  “I’m not saying no, but I’m not saying yes either.” I explain. “I just don’t believe a drunken argument is the place for a proposal. I mean think about it, one day our kids are going to ask how you did it. Is that really the story you want to tell them?”

  “You still see a future with me? With kids and everything?”

  I chuckle softly. “Of course, I do, you doof.”

  Relief washes over him and he grins so wide that his dimples show. “Okay, I can deal with that.”

  A light blush covers my cheeks as we sit there staring at each other for a few minutes. It isn’t until Jo rushes into the room that we look away. She drops her things on the floor and lunges to hug him, sobbing as he rubs her back. When she finally pulls away, she smacks him directly in the chest.

  “You stupid shithead! What the hell is wrong with you?” She chastises him. He rubs where she just hit and shields himself from more onslaught. “What the fuck were you thinking?!”

  “I wasn’t. I wasn’t thinking at all. I’m sorry.”

  I grab my phone and take a couple steps away from the bed. “I’ll give you two a minute to talk.” Just before I get to the door, Holden calls my name.

  “Promise you’ll come back?”

  It takes everything in me to ignore the butterflies. “I promise.”

  Stepping out into the hallway, I send a quick text to Dawson to let him know everything is alright. Once that’s done, I dial the number for the one person who has always given the best advice.

  “Hey babes.” Emily answers.

  The sound of her voice instantly soothes me. “Hi.”

  “Everything okay?”

  “Eh.” I hesitate. “Define okay.”